A page from my diary - dated Feb 1,Friday

“ My hope is all gone ...
I've waited too long...
The day,I'm waiting for
It's never gonna come..
She's never gonna look at me...
I’ve stayed awake for her too long..

May be I should quit and go home ... May be it’s really too long for me , may be I should just move on with my life and leave her to live like she wants to,don’t disturb her ….. but there is something about her that just doesn’t make me wanna leave her just like that in a click … there is something about her ... something that may be only I see , that makes me wanna stick with her for as long as I live … even though everybody’s saying that she’s not worth it, even though everybody’s saying that I am not for her and she’s not for me … I am willing to be what she is looking for, I am and I will change myself if it would get her feel that I love her like crazy ….like a kid likes a chocolate, like a drunkard likes his drink, like a programmer like his laptop, I won't say that LOVE will be the best thing to describe what I feel for her but I will say that I am crazy for her and I don’t know what I would do without her …. I’ve seen a friend of mine, he was in love too and then his so called girlfriend left him and I was thinking that if this had happened with me ??then may be my life would have just stopped right there … my heart would have stopped beating ,my eyes would have stopped seeing , my ears would have stopped hearing and I would have stopped living….even the thought of this for a moment and tears are all my eyes, I can’t help it … I am what I am, no matter whoever says whatever it is what it is and it is going to be as it is until I am over with it